How to Make Bad Video Games Good
Spyro: Enter the Dragonfly *Have there be less time on the loading screens. Dark Castle Genesis version *Make it have better controls. *Replace the music sustainer with a music silencer. *Give the character the colors as the CD-I version rather than the colors of Shaggy from Scooby-Doo! CD-I version *Unlike the Genesis version, make it have better controls. Action 52 and Cheetahmen 2 Action 52 *Make menus better. *Bring a better background for Critical Bypass over the eye-strain inducing background. *Make controls better like A is jump B is shoot. *Make the player die while falling from the tallest height. *Improve Cheetahmen stages easier. *Give better music over the stolen ones. *Make the game easier than ever. *Fix all the glitches. *Fix all the crashing games. *Fix all the misspelled names. *Have in Cheetahmen a story just like in the sequel. Cheetahmen 2 *Fix all the glitches, just like Action 52. *Make the game easier than ever, just like Action 52. *Give better music, just like Action 52. Hong Kong 97 *Make the game have more music rather than one music, and also give it sound effects. *Fix all the Engrishes. *Remove the F-word. *Let the game don't loop *Give it better backgrounds rather than monochrome images of logos, and random stuff. Superman 64 *Make the controls easier to handle. *Give it more action-packed levels than tedious training stages. Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing *Remove the glitches and stuff. *Make Nightride work right. >implying Big Rigs isn't a masterpiece Looney Tunes Acme Arnesal *Don't put in the Looney Tunes. **And put in fresh and new characters. Dead or Alive 4/5 *Stop the Dead or Alive series after 3 Goku Racing *Make it a Mario Kart 8 style go-kart racing game on Wii U. Intellivision Lives! *Make it Atari instead Other than that, this game can't be improved. Intellivision is god-awful, so there'd be no way to fix this. Bart vs. The Space Mutants *Make the enemies killable by jumping on them ala Super Mario Bros. *Don't have The Simpsons theme play on any of the stages, just the title screen. *Don't put the tilting lollipops in the mall stage. *Unlimited continues in case of game over. *Get rid of the time limit. *Have Bart say "Cool man!" instead Marge saying it. E.T. *Make it a Super Mario Bros style platform game on NES. Rocko's Modern Life: Spunky's Dangerous Day *Have the plot be where Spunky get dognapped and Rocko has to save him. *Make it a beat 'em up platform game. Mega Man X6 *Stop the Mega Man X series after 5. Sonic '06 *Make the developers of this game change their minds about releasing this game in Sonic's 15th anniversary, release an remastered version of Sonic Jam instead, and delay the game to 2007 and call it Sonic Adventure 3 (or Sonic's Mobius Rescue in Sophie the Otter's case). *Remove the darn glitches! *The first boss is 1/500 of a solaris. Arcana Heart 3 *Have at least 1 Boy in the roster *Get rid of Kazu Sonic Genesis (GBA) *Make this game an GBA version of Sonic Jam and have all of the graphics be redone and have an Sonic Advance engine on each game in it. Sonic Boom *Make this game a Star vs. The Forces of Evil-themed game and have all cameos from all Disney (including characters from non-Disney shows airing on their channels) characters in history. Bubsy Franchise *Change Bubsy into a less annoying, more outgoing beaver and give him chomping and tail attack abilities. His gliding should be replaced with flaps of his tail to slow his fall. Also, his design (pictured) should be like this: *If Bubsy is a beaver, make him care about wood instead of yarn! For the pieces of wood he collects, players would be able to make them into a variety of different weapons, vehicles, and other objects. *Change Bubsy's catchphrase to "Munch, baby, Munch!" (which shouldn't be overused unlike "What could possibly go wrong?") *Add more gimmicks and include some areas involving Bubsy munching his way in a maze type mini-game called "Maze-o-Munch". Maze-o-Munch game comes after every 4 levels until the end, thus including 3 MoMs. *Change the Woolies to small critters called Porky Pinecones (part warthog, part porcupine, and part Pinecone, based on Wuzzles' Piggypine). *Fix the physics, controls, camera and hit collision detection. *Use the side of a log as a four-wedge pie chart to represent health (a la Super Mario 64) instead of the one-hit-and-die feature. *Delay Bubsy 3D for the 1997-1998 season for further, deeper production. *Replace the unnecessary passwords with an actual save option. *Have Bubsy be voiced by Gregg Berger. All of LJN's Games *Destroy that company, and have their games be made by other companies. Nuff said. All of Data Design Interactive's Games *Same thing with LJN's. Again, nuff said. Pac-Man (Atari 2600) *Better graphics *Better music *Better overall gameplay. Need I say more? Lester the Unlikely *Remove Lester's voices and a few of the animations. *Add Lester's attacks like jumping. *Remove the falling damage when you jump off a cliff. *Remove a few of the bats. *Change Level 1's music to Cool Spot-like music. *Make the purple totem pole have only one hit. *Make Lester not run away at some enemies. *Make Lester have a different walking animation. Oliver's Pasta Adventure *Have the protagonist be Toni Cipriani. **Then the "YOU PASTA WAY" text would be "WASTED", amirite ladies? A Week of Garfield *Have it released in North America and Europe. *Have it developed and published by Capcom. *Have it released on the both NES and Game Boy. *Make it just like DuckTales, Adventures of the Magic Kingdom and Little Nemo: The Dream Master. Takeshi's Challenge *Delay it for 1987 season. *Remove bad words. *Change and add more music then one annoying music. *Make the graphics like Little Samson. Category:How To Category:Video Games Category:Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing Category:Looney Tunes Category:Intellivision lives sucks Category:The Simpsons Category:E.T. Category:Nickelodeon Category:Bubsy Category:Garfield Category:LJN